Breathing Through the Stress

I am feeling very stressed! Family drama, corporate taxes due, community chaos and now, snow removal! Yes…I’m feeling stressed.

So, along with deciding to get a therapist (everyone in the podcast world has one), I turn to my friends, the Stoics.

Why?

I can relate to their calming approach to handling what is out of my control. And I need that reminder of what to do when I don’t know what to do. It helps me calm down.

Stoicism is this ancient Greek and Roman philosophy that offers strategies for managing stress. It focuses on personal control, rational thinking, and emotional resilience.

Epictetus (c. 50–135 CE), a former slave became a prominent Stoic teacher. His teachings, compiled in "The Discourses" and the "Enchiridion," focus on personal freedom, self-discipline, and the distinction between what is within our control and what is not.

The Stoics believed that peace of mind comes from understanding the difference between what is within our control and what isn't.

We can control our thoughts, our actions, and our responses.

We cannot control any external events, other people's actions, or outcomes.

So how can I practice this right now? By focusing my energy on my own responses (becoming more self-aware) and letting go of the external factors of which I have no control.

According to the Stoics, I can practice acceptance “Amor Fati.”

Amor fati means "love of fate." It means embracing everything that happens, good or bad, as necessary and beneficial to life.

And that requires me taking a really, really deep breath.

Instead of resisting or resenting challenging situations, I must accept them as opportunities for growth and learning. I’m still learning that!

Try negative visualization: “Premeditatio Malorum”
I’d not heard this term before. This involves imagining potential challenges or negative outcomes to prepare ourselves emotionally and mentally.

If I can contemplate possible difficulties in advance, I can become less anxious when facing them and more resilient in handling them. In other words, prepare for the worst, just in case. I like that!

Keep a Rational mindset
Stoics emphasized the importance of reason over emotion.

They believed that by thinking logically, we can manage and mitigate negative emotions.

How might this work for me?

When stressed, I must analyze the situation objectively. Then ask myself if the stressor is really important and monitor my actions so my response is appropriate. I must slow my thinking down and focus on what I am thinking. What?!

Be Mindful and Present Focus
Stoics advocate for being present and fully engaged in the current moment rather than dwelling on the past or worrying about the future.

Techniques like deep breathing help center you and alleviate stress. That yoga works for me!

Develop Resilience
Stoicism views challenges as opportunities to strengthen our character and build resilience.

When faced with stress, I must still force myself to view it as a chance to develop perseverance and courage. I’m getting better at doing that...I think!

Journal and Reflect
The Stoics engaged in daily reflection to assess their thoughts and actions. I’m discovering that writing down my thoughts in my journal (at the end of the day) helps me process my emotions, and reflect on what went well, what didn't, and how I can improve. This allows me to relax all well.

Final Thoughts

What’s your system for de-stressing? How’s it working for you?

How about giving the Stoic philosophy a try?